Forever Mine Read online

decided if we will be able to go away this year, you know, with things the way they are.’

  ‘Why, what’s wrong love?’

  ‘Oh, it’s nothing, don’t worry about it. I mean, I’m sure that John will sort it.’

  ‘John, what’s John got to do with your holiday. Your worrying me now Jen. Tell me what the bloody hell is going on.’

  ‘Calm down Michelle, it’s fine. It’s just that we can’t book anything until John gives us the money back.’

  ‘What money?’

  ‘Oh sorry Mich, I thought you knew. I think it was around the time that he met you actually. John was having some financial problems and so he asked if we could help him out. We only had our holiday money so we lent him that. So we just don’t want to book anything until we know we have the money, that’s all.’

  Bingo. This should do the trick.

  Later that night John was worried about me. ‘Your quiet babe, anything wrong.’

  ‘Oh no just ignore me, it’s probably nothing, you know me, just a bit sensitive.’

  ‘Don’t be silly, tell me what’s on your mind.’ Got him. Hook, Line, Sinker.

  I told John that Jennifer had been really nasty and had been blaming us for the fact that they could not go on holiday. I made out that she had called John for everything and accused us of robbing them.

  I suspected this would be enough to cause a problem but I didn’t expect the explosive response that came from my loving John. I have never seen anybody so angry, so abusive and so nasty. This was not the person I knew. Within minutes he had phoned Jennifer and Ben. The rest of the night was spent emailing increasingly abusive text messages to each other. I was sure now that I had solved the problem of Jennifer, once and for all. I couldn’t believe that the damage caused by the numerous messages could easily be resolved, especially with me advising and ’supporting’ John. But what price had I paid. That night I couldn’t sleep. Was this the person I loved? Was this the person I wanted to spend the rest of my life with? By morning I had convinced myself that no, this wasn’t my John. It was them. It was what they had driven him to. I was right all along. These people were no good for John. He needed to be away from them. All he needed was me. Forever, just me.

  The next day John was back to the perfect, thoughtful man I knew. Nothing was going to come between us. Nothing was going to spoil my happiness.

  ‘So you see Louise, she was just awful. She never liked me and then the way they treated John. I just couldn’t take it.’

  ‘Oh Michelle, she sounds awful. Poor you. I’m so proud of you though babes, you know, for trying so hard to make things work for John’s sake.’ ‘What about Patrick? What’s he like. You know, in my head, he is just like John, just a younger version. Tell me all about him.’

  Well, what could I tell her. Patrick and John were like two peas in a pod. Whereas in some people this could have caused them to clash a lot, they had found a way to get along and as a father and son, were incredibly close. Part of this was due to the arrival of Charlie and Emily. They were John’s grandchildren and undoubtedly, the apples of his eye.

  If there was one thing about John that had started to irritate me, oh my word, it was the way that he would go on about Patrick and those bloody children.

  Every day it was, ‘Oh Michelle, guess what Charlie did today,’ or ‘Michelle, come and have a look at Emily wearing that dress we bought her.’

  Even when we were out, it was, ‘Michelle, we will have to get this for Charlie,’ Then I would have to wait around whilst he sent a text to Saint Patrick to tell him what he had bought.

  I mean, I know that they were his family, but they had their own lives and John, well, he had me.

  I hated them all. I loved John more than anybody else in the world could possibly ever love him, but I was not the most important person in his life, not while he had Patrick, Charlie and Emily.

  I had thought that getting rid of Jennifer would make me happy, but now I just had more time to notice and think about the way that Patrick and the children annoyed me. Something was going to have be done. I wouldn’t stand for it.

  Patrick had remained close to both his mum and dad following their divorce. It was so bloody amicable that John and Sue would visit each other and talk on the phone. So, on top of everything, I had a smug ex-wife to deal with. Every time that he looked at me I knew that Patrick was comparing me against his mother and that each time I was coming up well short. I hated them, especially her.

  Obviously I couldn’t let John know how I felt. I had to show willing, had to make an effort. So before I knew what was happening, time that could have been spent, just me and John, in fancy restaurants and walking round art galleries now had to be spent pushing screaming kids on the swings in the park and eating cheap, nasty burgers in fast food places. Oh my god, make this stop.

  Before I could reply I was shocked by a sudden jolt in the back of my chair. I looked over to see an unruly boy a couple of years older than Charlie was running round the coffee shop terrorising customers with a toy bow and arrow that it looked like he had just purchased from poundland. As I turned back to Michelle I saw the frazzled waitress just miss tripping over him whilst his oblivious mother carried on playing with her phone. Kids!

  ‘Well Louise, John thought it would be best for me to meet Patrick over dinner, just Patrick, me and John. I really wanted to make a good impression, really wanted him to like me, you know for John’s sake.’

  ‘Oh I know Mich, that’s just you though, isn’t it babes. Always putting everybody else before yourself.’

  Louise was right, obviously I wanted John to be happy so of course I was going to try to see the best in Patrick. But. You just know with some people the minute you see them. You can see the good in people or the bad in people. With Patrick I could tell as soon as I saw him that he was not my cup of tea. I knew that he was looking down his nose at me. I knew that he would never think that I was good enough for his dad. He would never think that anybody was good enough for John apart from Sue.

  My views about Patrick were confirmed about halfway through dinner. One of John’s friends had bought his grandson a new, top of the range bike and John wanted to buy one for Charlie. That was my, kind, John, wanting to give his grandchildren everything. What a kind man. Or so you would think, but no, not good enough for Patrick. He made excuses about how it had just been Charlie’s birthday and he had been spoilt rotten then. Patrick thought that a gift like that was too much and told John that he would rather he didn’t do it. Oh, but I knew what was going on. This was nothing to do with Charlie being spoilt. This was obviously Patrick being mean because he did not like me. Anyway, forgetting that, who did he think he was, talking to my John like that. He was Charlie’s grandad, and if he wanted to treat his grandson, then why should anybody stop him. I would make sure I spoke to John about that later.

  True to my word, that night, as we were preparing our supper I casually mentioned the bike to John and told him that I understood that he must be terribly disappointed. After a small amount of persuasion, I got him to see that he should ignore Patrick. If getting the bike would make him and Charlie happy, he should just do it. He could just tell Patrick that he had already ordered it. Once he presented it to Charlie, who would love it, what could Patrick do.

  We agreed to a compromise. We would get the bike but we would leave it a couple of months before giving it to Charlie. That way we could claim that we thought it would be ok now that it was not so close to his birthday.

  Sure enough that it was what we did. Three months later we invited Patrick, Cara and the children over to John’s. As soon as they arrived, John told Charlie that there was something for him in the back garden. He ran into the back garden and we all followed, John focusing on the look on Charlie’s face when he saw his surprise. I on the other hand was only interested in the look on Patrick’s face when he saw that we had gone against his wishes. One look was all it took to see the expression I had been hoping for. Patrick was furiou
s, and when he looked at John, John knew it to. They didn’t realise it then, but that was the moment that their relationship changed forever.

  Of course, nobody would ever suspect me of anything untoward. For the six months after I first met Patrick I was sweetness personified. Nothing was too much trouble for me when he was around. ‘Patrick love, let me get you another drink.’ Patrick love, leave that to me,’ ‘Patrick love, of course I don’t mind.’ I wouldn’t be surprised if they thought I loved them. Then again, Patrick probably thought that everybody loved him. Well not for long.

  Whilst spending time with Patrick and the snivelling brats I was quietly going about my business, gathering bits of information that might come in useful. Before long I knew that Charlie had swimming lessons on a Tuesday night, Emily had playgroup on Saturday mornings and every other Sunday was family time when they would go on a family day out.

  Using the information that I had gathered I started inviting them over at times when I knew they couldn’t make it. I knew John would never remember things such as the schedule of the children as he didn’t pay much attention to these things. Every time I invited them over and they said they couldn’t make it I would pretend to be really disappointed and upset. Every time I invited them over and they said they couldn’t make it I would,